Hello to the woman reading this post (yes you).
You’re not a priority.
How does it feel when I say that to you? Not very good I imagine. Would you tell your best friend or partner that they’re not a priority? Probably not. So why would you tell that to yourself?
How do you know if you’re not making yourself a priority?
Well, if you’re missing out on healthy habits like eating well, exercise, meditation, or your regular visits to the gyno or dentist because “you don’t have time,” you’re basically telling yourself that you’re not a priority.
Many of us have busy schedules, and before we know it, we wake up one day and realize we’re neglecting to care for our body and mind. We’ve lost control of the steering wheel of our life and have let our busy schedule take over the driving.
When we feel out of control of our schedule, we act like victims. We say things like, “I would love to, if only there were more hours in the day.” But really, we are not victims. How we spend our time is actually a choice that reflects our priorities. The things “we don’t have time to do” are not priorities because if they were, we would make time for them.
Are your priorities reflected accurately by the way you spend your time?
-
Here’s a simple 6-step process to find out:
1. Get out 9 pieces of paper.
2. At the top of each sheet of paper write one of the following categories: Health, Friendship, Intimate Relationship, Family, Career, Money, Physical Environment ( home, car, office), Personal Growth, Fun and Recreation.
3. Under each category, answer the following question: What must I be, do, or have in this area of my life to feel fulfilled and happy? You could also think about it like this: If I were to die tomorrow, what would I be sad that I didn’t get to be, do, or have in this area of my life?
4. Look over what you wrote and highlight each word or phrase that resonates with you as one of your core values.
5. Look over your schedule to see how you’ve been spending your time over the past two weeks. Take note of each time you honored one of the values you highlighted in step four.
6. Notice if you honored your core values over 50% of the time in the past two weeks. If you did, you’re doing a great job of making yourself a priority. If you notice that you honored your values less than 50% of the time, it’s a sign that you’re not making yourself the priority you deserve to be.
If you fall in the less than 50% category, you may notice your mind coming up with reasons why it’s impossible to find the time to make yourself a priority. That’s ok. Just notice. Over the next week, I challenge you to replace the words “I don’t have enough time,” with “that is not a priority for me.” Notice how it feels to change your wording.
In some cases it may feel empowering, like when you’re setting a boundary so you can spend more time doing things that truly are priorities. In other cases, it may conflict with a value, like when you convince yourself you don’t have time to exercise today because the things on your to-do list “have to get done.”
If your values are not reflected in the way you spend your time, you’re setting yourself up for unhappiness. Let’s set ourselves up for extraordinary lives by going the extra length to honor our values through what we choose to make priorities in our life!
Cheers to your extraordinarily daring life!
Big hugs and lots of love,
Certified Professional Co-Active Coach
Life Coaching and Small Business Coaching for Driven Daring Divas
Do you want personal support in creating an extraordinary life and/or business?
{ 0 comments }
Hope has had plenty of opportunities to unleash her Inner Bitch: As a middle school and high school English teacher, she often practiced on her students who taught her that your Inner Bitch is most effective when she shows fierce love and compassion.
Jessie May is the founder of Daring Divas USA and a Certified Professional Co-Active Coach. Learning to unleash her Inner Bitch has been an essential ingredient in creating the dream of owning her own business and making a positive impact on women’s lives.
“Before coaching, I felt like I wasn't an active participant in my own life. Jessie May helped me overcome my negative internal thoughts and challenged me to live a more dynamic life in line with my true passions. I am happy to say that I am no longer living passively and am actively engaged in my daily decisions and interactions! I am well on my way to achieving a challenging goal of 105 social events in 365 days! I feel much more confident in my abilities to take charge of my life and create my destiny. Jessie May is so much fun to work with and is genuinely committed to seeing her clients achieve their full potential!”
“Jessie May helped me go from being an anxious, emotional train wreck to actually driving a life I love. I’ve been able to recognize my core values and make my personal and professional lives reflect these values. Whenever I’m drifting into action based on “shoulds” rather than what I know I want in my heart, Jessie May never fails to call me on it. She supports me in making decisions to achieve what I want by guiding me back to the path I have chosen whenever I start to stray.”
"In a short period of time, Jessie May brought me through feelings of hopelessness, to a place of power, where I was able to find the next step to achieving a life that I can now call my own. She supported me through each small change so that I now find myself in a completely new life, a life of beauty and truth.”
Coaching with Jessie May has been one of the best experiences of my life. The experience has allowed me to look at my life in a whole new way which has led me to make changes to become a much happier person!